"It's just a phase, pick a side!": Why 'Bi-Erasure' is a problem within society.

Hi everyone!

As Pride Month is coming to an end, today I wanted to bring awareness to an issue that needs attention brought to.

Since coming out as a bisexual man in August of 2017, I have noticed and personally encountered the extent that bi-erasure and biphobia is present within society. I have, on numerous occasions (more than I can count, really), experienced multiple forms of biphobia and bi-erasure. I am making this post to demonstrate why it is so prominent and how being bisexual is just as valid as every other sexuality!

Firstly, What is 'Bi-Erasure'?

In short, 'bi-erasure' disregards and discredits a bisexual individual's experiences and sexuality. It ignores the sexuality as a whole and creates this idea that bisexuality does not exist. Many are questioned, or even told, what their sexuality is/should be.

You have probably heard the phrases; "if you HAD to choose a side..." or "do you prefer men or women?". These phrases are just 2 examples of bi-erasure. Asking someone who is bisexual to "choose a side" or asking them which gender they prefer is removing the legitimacy of a bisexual's sexuality.

Jennifer Moore / Uncharted Worlds

What are other examples of 'Bi-Erasure'?

There are so many different examples of 'bi-erasure'. In my personal experiences, specifically in night clubs or during my first encounter with someone, I have been asked almost immediately "Are you gay?". This is a perfectly okay thing to ask! It is when I tell people that I am bisexual that the bi-erasure comes in. I have had "No way I thought you were gay" or "Nah you have to be gay surely".

By saying this, my sexuality is immediately being ignored and unrecognised. Firstly, my sexuality does not concern anyone other than myself. Whether I am gay or bisexual, my sexuality is MY sexuality. By saying to a bisexual individual that "you have to be gay" is erasing their sexuality, removing its legitimacy.

As well as this, I have been told that I am just saying I'm bisexual to make it easier for me to come out as gay in the future. This is again removing the legitimacy of bisexuality whilst also disregarding the fluidity that someone's sexuality is.

There is also this stigma that bisexual people are "more inclined to cheat" . This is an extremely biphobic assumption. Just because an individual happens to like more than one gender does not make them more inclined to cheat, it just means that they don't see love through gender but through the person!

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I hope anyone that reads this are able to gain an idea into what 'bi-erasure' is. It is something that I have experienced for the last 3 years.

Everyone is inclined to love WHOEVER they want, regardless of their gender or sexuality. No matter who you identify as, YOU are valid and YOU are just as important as everyone else!

Pride doesn't just stop after June, pride lasts the whole year, and I hope people can educate themselves on the importance and legitimacy of someone's identity.

I hope to live in a world one day where I can express who I love and express my sexuality without it being disregarded and ignored.

Thank you for reading my rant on bi-erasure. I hope I was able to shed some light onto why it is an issue within society and the struggles that bisexual people face because of their sexuality.

Until next time,

Matt x

#LGBTQ #Bisexual #pridemonth #loveislove